1.09.2008

An awakening

Well, once again I feel the need to express my self via written word. This is brought upon me do to a change in my perspective of life. You see my life has recently become exponentially more difficult. My wife is 5 months pregnant, and our marriage is on its last limb.

I have been having an existential quandary of 'What should I do? '. Well I have decided that its over between us, but the biggest worry for me right now is my unborn child. You see her family are well, Hillbillies to put it nicely. you see she cannot both work and take care of my child, so the alternative is a babysitter. The baby sitter would end up either being her mother, a pill addicted women who chain smokes, curses like a drunken sailor, and falls asleep with a lit cigarette in her hand. The other choice would be her sister who is currently in jail for writing bad checks and Violation of parole (*~drug use~*), and has 3 kids with a drug using, child abusing, bastard.

Worse then all of this, she is showing the signs of postpartum depression already.

We are currently living with her parents, this is difficult to say the least. Any way I'm going astray from the topic at hand... Today I had to pay the electric bill so that it would not get shut off. Correct me if I am wrong, but to me that seems like the thing to do ? doesn't it ? I told her this, and she proceed to burst into tears, and tell me how we wont be able to to pay car insurance and its a huge tragedy. Any way I'm simply done, I cannot take it any more, I'm gonna kill someone.

Summation;
Life's a carnival, Ride 'till you puke.

~Sudo X Root

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