Sixx am

I sit here listening to sixx am. As I do I realize that I don't know why I do it. Listening to the girl with the golden eyes to me is like a being slowly forced to relive every pain I have ever felt. I love the band. The song. Even the memories. Yet still somehow. In some primal way I won't let go. And so. It tortures me. Burns my very soul. Or what's left of it. Never really knowing how or Better yet why I'm still alive. I shouldn't be. I pulled the trigger. Didn't I? Maybe I missed Maybe the bottle Wasn't loaded. Wasn't it. Maybe I'm just ... not here. Possably a figment. Of My? Your? Imagination. How could I know Can someone Would someone For sure Fiery yellow Golden Carnal memory Long. Needed Why not it's lost But I ... you can't Then I'll Its a shame ? Is it ... Shame I don't Pity I won't Honestly Will I miss?? Sure you will Never know But then again I miss you